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What to say when things go poorly Just Another Day in CavalrylandBy Rick Horowitz "Fall in, men! The general wants to have a few words with you." "Thank you, Sgt. McAuliffe. Thank you, men. I -- " "CUSTER! CUSTER! CUSTER!" "Thank you. Thank you all so much, and thanks so much to the Montana Territory and especially to Little Bighorn! You've had the last word in this historic effort, and it was certainly worth the wait." "CUSTER! CUSTER! CUSTER!" "I want to start by congratulating Chief Crazy Horse and his supporters for the extraordinary campaign that they've waged. The Sioux, the Cheyenne, the Arapaho -- they've given all of us here in the 7th Cavalry a real run for our money, and our nation is stronger and more vibrant as a result. "But enough about them -- let's talk about me. "Now, it was many long months ago that you and I started out on this journey of ours. We've journeyed far and wide, from grasslands to bluffs to picturesque river basins. And at every step along the way, in the millions of quiet moments, I know you asked yourselves a simple question: Who is the strongest general? Who will be ready to protect our growing nation and lead us to better tomorrows?" "CUSTER! CUSTER! CUSTER!" "You've had a chance to make your voices heard, and because of you, we have occupied more acres of the Montana Territory than any other fighting force in history -- and we have occupied the swing acreage, the areas that are so vital to victory in the fall!" "YES WE WILL!
YES WE WILL!" "We've controlled those key battleground regions. And we've done it despite the pundits and the naysayers proclaiming week after week that this fight was over, that we've been outmaneuvered and we were overconfident and we should call it quits. But because -- " "Excuse me, General?" "I'm on a roll here, corporal! Can't it wait?" "Well..." "It can wait, corporal!" "Yes, sir." "As I was saying, because we stood our ground, we have made history in this campaign. Now, I understand that a lot of people are asking, 'What does Custer want? What does he want?' Well, I want what I have always wanted: to solve the problems of little people just like you, with little dreams just like yours." "CUSTER! CUSTER!" "Now, the question is: Where do we go from here? This is a question I don't take lightly. This has been a long campaign, and I will be making no decisions today." "DENVER! DENVER! DENVER!" "But this has always been your campaign. So to all of you who've stood with me, and to all those others out there who've supported me with your thoughts and prayers and greenbacks, I want to hear from you. I hope you'll telegraph me at GeorgeCuster.com and share your feelings with me. In the -- " "Uh, General?" "Not now, corporal!" "But -- " "In the days ahead, I'll be consulting with my fellow generals and others to determine how to move forward in the best interests of our country, and how to -- " "Here they come!" "How to -- " "We're done for!!" "On second thought, maybe I'll just pack it in." Posted 6/5/08. Get
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Rick Horowitz
